Hey ScribeSquad! How have we been? Today I want to talk about the cost of self-doubt, dealing with insecurities and learning to trust yourself.

The most expensive thing in life is self-doubt. Not believing in yourself or trusting your abilities costs us so much, it is just too painful to pay up. I think the biggest problem when it comes to believing in ourselves is that we don’t trust ourselves!

Ask yourself this; “Do I trust ME?” If the answer is yes, then why do you doubt your abilities?

You see we all started out confident! As children we believed we could be anything and we could talk to just about anyone and walk into places with our heads held up high. But somewhere along the line, life lessons and circumstances changed all that for us. And that is understandable, however you need to ask yourself “What changed that for you?’’ (comment down below). For me it was that teacher in school who said I wasn’t smart enough, that classmate who said I wasn’t good enough to be her friend, that one time I failed an exam. And so slowly a block is knocked off our confidence scale, making us trust our abilities a little less.

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Before I go any further, I just want us to establish some facts that would make believing and trusting yourself easier for you. THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ONE STEP AHEAD. I say this because we live in the social media age and a large chunk of self-doubt stems from our consumption of the media, we see people whose lives are looking better than ours, and it makes us feel less than we are. But when you understand that no matter where you are or what you do someone will be a step ahead, in the same vain someone will be a step behind, it prevents you from placing your quality on the scale of people’s performances.

SOMEONE BEING A STEP AHEAD DOES NOT TAKE AWAY FROM YOUR VALUE. DOESN’T MEAN YOU ARE LESS EXCELLENT.

Self-doubt also stems from us being UNREALISTIC! There is a process; do not expect to start a business and two weeks later compare yourself to someone who started five years earlier or compare yourself to someone who has a talent for a certain skill while you have to learn said skill, obviously your progress won’t be at par. Comparing yourself to others in this way is basically setting yourself up for failure.

Seen my last post? Click HERE

Another factor in self-doubt is FEAR! I remember when I told my dad I wasn’t confident, he looked so hurt and offended on my behalf, and asked me why? My reason was ‘well I get scared before I go on stage to do my poems, I get scared when I have to talk to new people etc’ and he said ‘of course you are scared confidence is not the lack of fear, but your reaction to fear’

You are allowed to feel fear, in fact you need to feel fear. However, the turning point is what you do with fear? Do you run from it or chase it? Do you hold onto fear and say; ‘let’s go on together since you won’t let me be’ or do you duck and concede?

When you doubt yourself, ask why? Why are you scared, why do you not believe in yourself, why do you think you can’t? Because in answering yourself, you find your answer to WHY YOU SHOULD!

Do not pay the cost of self-doubt, do not live a sub-par life because you feel you can’t do better, or you do not trust yourself to do better.

People can’t trust you or buy into your dreams if you do not trust yourself!

Tell yourself it is okay to fail, yes you trust yourself and still fail, that is okay! Do not allow failure to cramp your style.

Give yourself room to fail and fall, because it is in falling you build your strength to stand.

REMIND YOURSELF DAILY THAT YOU ARE LOVED AND YOU CAN!

See you lovelies on Monday! Ave an amazing weekend ahead.

PS. Check out my YouTube Channel HERE and you can follow me on Instagram to keep up with me between blog posts.

STAY SHINING LOVELIES

MODEL: KAHINA

PHOTOGRAPHER: THE BLACKSCRIBBLER